Jerk of the Day

You’d think that on such an idyllic island people would behave themselves. Sadly burglary and petty theft have been on the rise (gang violence too, but that’s for another day). Open the pages of the Royal Gazette and you’re bound to read a story about someone getting robbed or a worried letter to the editor about how he or she is afraid to live here. Just yesterday the newspaper published a note signed CONCERNED CITIZEN OF BERMUDA that started like this: “Here I sit by my window every night looking out wondering who’s coming down the road. We have been robbed three times and numerous houses in the area have been as well. The public better get ready because they are coming, it’s only a matter of what day and what time.” Sure, it’s a hearty dose of fear mongering but the letter does raise a point. Take this latest story for example. It was reported yesterday that thieves broke into a children’s nursery, the Kiddie Academy in Pembroke, and stole a laptop, $100 cash—and here’s the worst part—chocolate milk belonging to the children. The story goes on to say that the burglar also grabbed a bottle of wine from an office party before starting a fire in the building too. Really? You need to steal the kid’s milk? Whoever you are Mr. Thief, you just won my Jerk of the Day award because that’s about the most despicable heist I can imagine (although I suppose if you nabbed a bunch of wheelchairs from the old folks home that would be one worse, but I don’t want to give you any ideas here). Having lived in New York City for most of my life I understand crime and with hope, the ways to avoid it. But on an island as small as Bermuda the bad always seems worse, an opinion clearly voiced by CONCERNED CITIZEN and the countless letters that flood the paper each day. Bottom line: I don’t claim to know how to get Bermuda back on track, but it might just start with a class trip to the dairy.