The Saga Continues

Last week I wrote about how difficult it was obtain one’s driver’s license. Never in a million years did I think I’d have similar problems getting legally certified to ride a scooter. How hard could the test be? After all, the whole thing takes about five minutes. In the TCD parking lot you’re expected to execute five simple commands on a bike (what Bermudians call scooters here; bicycles are called pedal bikes): First the walk test, where you’re expected to walk the scooter around four cones in a figure eight pattern without losing control. Check. Next up, the roundabout test, where you drive down a straight line, go clockwise around a circle, turn around, and drive counterclockwise around the same circle and back. Check. The third task, called serpentine ride, has you zig-zag between six sets of orange cones, down and back. Check. For the brake test, the applicant must ride a straight line between cones, turn at the end, and ride back, applying the brake in a safe and controlled manner. Check. And then there’s the turn signal test, which by all accounts I blew big time. For the fifth and final part of the exam, you’re expected to ride down a straight line and using your indicators, make a right hand turn and come back. I used my indicator, but apparently I was also supposed to use hand signals as well. Really Mr. Scooter Examiner? Hand signals in addition to my blinker? So you’re saying you want me to drive the bike with one hand even though I have my indicator light on? Really? And for not doing that I fail and can’t take the test for another week? Seriously? I’m pretty sure the guy just didn’t like me and so for that I received this pretty little piece of paper (see above). The good news is my wife is one helluva test taker. With just one short driving lesson under her belt, Joy hopped on the bike in the TCD parking lot and passed the exam with flying colors. I’m not sure how she knew to use her hands, but I’m pretty sure Bermuda is suiting her just fine.

A License To (Almost) Drive

It was just the other day when I wrote about preparing for my written driver’s license exam by picking up a copy of the Traffic Code Handbook. Turned out to be a useful little book actually, sort of like Bermuda’s version of Cliff Notes. I learned that a double white line on the road is like a double yellow in the States, that’s it’s illegal to “dazzle” other drivers with your headlights, and that I should watch for signs denoting the crossing of cattle, wild fowl, or horse drawn vehicles. Your basic stuff really. Trusty book in hand, I set off to the TCD to take my test and guess what? I passed! Although this doesn’t mean I’m fit to drive legally, just that I’ve earned a learner’s permit—the next step in a mind-blowingly long process to obtain one’s license. Permit in hand, I can now book a lesson with a local instructor who’ll no doubt give me a few pointers about mastering the driving test—and most importantly—arrange for an exam sooner than 2010. Unfortunately I’m only half-joking about that last part. The TCD is happy to schedule you for a driving test once you obtain a permit, but it’s not going to be anytime soon, the very reason why one needs to hire a driving instructor to grease the wheels so to speak. So be it. I don’t really care what I have to do to get my driver’s license, I’m just looking forward to handing over the keys to my rental scooter.

“It’s Your Lucky Day!”

Finally a few words of encouragement in the ongoing quest to obtain a Bermuda driver’s license. They were spoken to me by a friendly man at the TCD (the island’s version of the DMV in New York, see above) when I showed up to buy a copy of the Traffic Code Handbook, a 54-page study guide to help prepare for my written test. For those of you not familiar with the licensing process, it comes with a few hurdles. There are requests for character references, mandatory doctor exams, weeks of waiting. But then came a glimmer of hope: my permit to reside here was finally approved, which meant I could legally take the written exam and begin walking the long road to car ownership. But first I needed that handbook. It was incredibly hot that day. Folks were perspiring through their shirts and fanning themselves with the newspaper, so it was no surprise that the heat was also stressing the power grid. Sure enough the TCD lost all power, just as the rest of Hamilton had for an hour or so. I didn’t imagine this would cause much of a problem—all I needed was a $2.65 handbook—but in addition to everything else in the building, the power loss knocked out the electronic cash register. With only a twenty-dollar bill in my pocket, I was faced with forking over all of my money or making the long trip back to town another day. Fortunately here’s where that nice guy comes in. “It’s your lucky day,” said the well-dressed fellow as he handed over the handbook free of charge. “Thank you very much sir!” was my reply in all sincerity. It might take me a few more weeks to get that license, but at least I’m one step closer.